1st countdown begins

Dear Heppy
today my first countdown begins - 90 days till my 1st appointment with a specialist at hepatology unit at st james's hospital in dublin
i'm very happy about that appointment because finally i'll be able (i hope) to ask all my questions from the list i've started writing down a while ago
i want to find out if they would treat me, if i need to have liver biopsy, how long i'd have to wait for the start, what other specialists i'd have to see for the assessment, what is their protocol regarding treatment, if they offer rescue drugs should my bloods fall and many other details depending on what would first answers be
at the same time i'm very anxious about that visit, i don't know what to expect, although i've already tried to gather some early intel so far i had no success in obtaining any valuable information so i'll be going in to a complete darkness armed with only a few matches of knowledge i so desperately collect on the hepC forum
i'm unable to put aside my reservations dictated by logical part of my mind, i've always been like that, trying to know before something happens and not being able to find out extremely irritates me but on the other hand spiritual part of my mind makes me full of hope because so far everything that happened leading to where i am now has been orchestrated from above and i trust it will continue, because i do believe everything happens for a reason and no matter how hard i'd try to change the inevitable or fear it, it will happen anyway because it has something in it for me to experience and learn from
i trust the universe and even though sometimes it's so hard to let go of control, today i'm in a good place and my heart is full of hope that whatever happens it's gonna be fine
me